THE DESTRUCTION OF THE WORLD TRADE CENTER CONSIDERED AS AN AERIAL RELAY RACE
Abstract
The attacks of September 11th 2001 raised many questions, not least being who was ultimately responsible for this deplorable event. This text suggests that an oblique view of that grim day and its aftermath may provide a more coherent explanation. JG Ballard’s “The Assassination of John Fitzgerald Kennedy Considered As A Downhill Motor Race” and Alfred Jarry’s “The Crucifixion Considered as an Uphill Bicycle Race” may give readers a useful lead.
Bin Laden was the starter.
Unable to travel easily, he organised his visiting teams by remote control.
As befitting the inauguration of the first aerial relay race over the eastern seaboard of the United States, Bin Laden chose the twin towers of the World Trade Center as the main relay points of the race. His American Airlines team took an early lead, its first aircraft making contact with the north tower at 0846. Unfortunately, Bin Laden had failed to advertise the race. This oversight caused the home crowd to believe that the north tower contact was an accident.
Bin Laden’s United Airlines team got off to a bad start.
Its first aircraft trailed the American Airlines team by over fifteen minutes, only picking up speed towards the end. Once the aircraft made contact with the south tower at 0903, the home crowd, realising that a relay race was now underway, became extremely vocal, despite the increasingly poor visibility.
The south tower completed its relay in record time, crossing the chequered square at 0959. The north tower was a distant second, not crossing until 1028. This caused widespread disquiet in the home crowd.
The second aircraft in the American Airlines team made contact with the Pentagon at 0937, but only a small section of this building was able to cross the chequered square. Race officials later declared the Pentagon relay to be void.
The second aircraft in the United Airlines team reported unforeseen technical problems and made an unscheduled pit stop at 1003, thus failing to obtain any race points. Its intended relay destination remains unknown.
In the final analysis, Bin Laden’s American Airlines team narrowly won the race on points.
The home crowd was organised by Bush, the President. Bush claimed that he hadn’t been invited to the race, which meant that his aircraft was on the ground when the race commenced. Unable to personally participate in the race, Bush instructed a number of representatives to be sent aloft, but the race was over by the time they arrived at the course.
Bush retired to the country for the remainder of the race and the subsequent counting, only visiting the course later that day to give an upbeat concession speech.
The race had three starting grids: Boston, Newark and Washington, where all bets were placed on the visiting teams. The complex course included the states of Connecticut, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Virginia and West Virginia. The course was considered to be one of the most hazardous in aerial relay racing, second only to the Kamikaze-Pacific, discontinued in 1945.
Commentators remain puzzled over several aspects of this aerial relay race, one being the nationality of the visiting teams. Bush maintained that they were from Iraq, despite the race sheet recording most as Saudi Arabian. As a long-standing ally of the home crowd, Saudi Arabia’s apparent failure to invite Bush to the race was inexplicable.
Some commentators theorise that Bush secretly declined Bin Laden’s race invitation, having been unnerved by his close race with VP Gore in the Florida 2000. Others suggest that Bush inadvertently slighted Bin Laden in some way; certainly, Bin Laden’s alleged failure to notify the race officials of his plans led Bush to claim that the race was illegal.
Many commentators now believe that Bush simply ignored Bin Laden’s invitation because he wanted to conserve his energies for a more strenuous overseas race – but that’s another story.
© Dan McNeil 2004 / 2021
Dan McNeil is a UK writer producing short fiction, reviews and art. His first story was translated, and published in a German science fiction magazine. Thereafter, his stories and reviews have appeared in a variety of print and online publications, including Alienist Manifesto, Antipodean SF, Bewildering Stories, Fantastic Metropolis, Full House Literary Magazine, Ink Magazine, Laura Hird’s Showcase, Mad Hatter’s Review, Outsider Ink, Redsine, Sein und Werden, The Short Review, Whispers of Wickedness, Word Riot and Zygote In My Coffee. His website is www.dan-mcneil.com; you can also follow him on Instagram and Twitter.